Friday, September 7, 2007

My Halliburton Email

Today I received the following email from Halliburton:

Hi [my name]

Halliburton recruiters are coming to Louisiana State University and would like to meet you! We are hiring students majoring in business, engineering, math,
physics, geology and science for exciting careers across the globe!

With nearly 50,000 employees in approximately 70 countries,
Halliburton is one of the world's largest providers of innovative
products and services to the oil and gas industry.

Learn how you can start your career with Halliburton. Our entry-level
positions offer career paths with boundless opportunities. Our
positions provide a comprehensive training program along with a
structured mentoring program to accelerate your learning.

Here is your opportunity to learn more!

Date: 9/12/2007 - Business Career Reception 9/13/2007 - Career & Graduate Job Expo

We hope to see you soon!

The Halliburton University Relations Team


Needless to say, my immediate impulse was to respond:

Dear War-Profiteers,

First and foremost, I would never in my life entertain the thought of working for a corporation that turns a direct profit from warfare in any way, shape, form or fashion. I will never work for a corporation that has any part in no-bid contracts that eliminate competition (much less the disreputable contracts and transactions Halliburton is associated with). Looking back only a few years, Halliburton's practices have been abysmal (and criminal):

* War profiteering

* Serving contaminated food and water to US troops

* Ongoing investigations concerning bribery, cronyism, nepotism, illegal monetary transactions, accounting fraud, loss of government property, securities law violations (etc.)

It is shameful that any corporation with a history such as Halliburton's should make an appearance at a university career expo: you are not worthy of acquiring such upstanding and intelligent persons as my peers. Rest assured that I will be attending the pre-expo reception in its entirety for the purpose of protesting Halliburton's practices and appearance as well as distributing literature detailing the grossly unethical and downright criminal history of the corporation.

See you soon!

[my full name]

Click here to find out how the protest went!

9 comments:

Avram said...

well done sir.

Anonymous said...

Well played, sir.

Anonymous said...

Well said sir! Stick it to the MAN.

Dorron said...

Better yet. Have a large amount of students go through the motions of applying for jobs (and appear genuinely interested). Then have them all turn them down, with a nicely worded letter, maybe in the school paper.


Give em Hell

dm

Anonymous said...

Good job, I can;t wait to follow ur example!!!!

Anonymous said...

Aah come on, they're not that bad.


Agent Smith.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, they'll read it. And tomorrow, Halliburton will be no more, because of your little piddling message.

Goddamn, revel in your own self-importance some more, and go back to clicking and typing.

Start adding some realism to that idealism, and you'll find your critical thinking skills becoming all the better.

Because if you've any, you'll realize it takes a fuck-ton more than your little response to make that crucial difference.

After all, how hard is it to click "delete" when checking e-mail?

Think, goddammit. No, no, think harder.

Kit said...

Awww, how cute !
It's so adorable when students protest Big Money.
Most of them will need jobs when they graduate, and those who can afford to thumb their noses at Big Money have Dad and Mummy to support them - money earned from ... Big Money, lol.
S'll right sweetie, you keep that one true wayism while you still can- after you've got responsibilities reality will intrude.

Publius said...

Naysayers,

I am not just "clicking and typing," seeing as how I've protested the event just like I said I would. (details when I have time)

Also, Kit, "mummy and daddy" do not pay for my college education. I have a scholarship that I EARNED that pays my tuition. I have also had a job at all times since age 17 , working for what you refer to as "big money." "Big money" is not what I am protesting; your reading comprehension skills are lacking. You likewise lack a spine if you are willing to throw away principles (which you refer to as wayisms) for ANY reason, much less due to the burden of responsibilities.